Saturday, March 7, 2009
today will be hard
Today is my best friends baby shower which I am having for her. I dread it. I love her more than I could ever say but when I go to these baby showers my heart feels like it is being ripped from my chest, has any of you ever felt this way? I want this to be my baby shower, I want to be the one opening the gifts and bringing them home, and soon be expecting the miracle that I have longed for. I guess I am just selfish and jealous. I am venting on here saying the things that I will say to no one. I need help from the Lord today. Please remember me in your prayers that I can be a good friend and put my self and my feelings out of the way so this can be her happy day. I have not been on here writing lately, I have been so depressed and in so much pain. The pain in my muscles has moved into my arms and hands now so I get tired of I type a lot. But I am going to try to get back on here later today and catch up on some of your blogs. My friend Alicia, you know who you are, I am going to have read your blog I haven't had the chance in a while. Keep in your prayers today my friends.