Friday, September 5, 2008
How I can make it through
There are times, (like this past week), that it is so hard to face not being able to have a child right now. Some of my friends are pregnant and I feel so alone. When will my time come I ask? Why am I have to go through all of this? So many problems are in my life right now. Besides not being able to concieve a child I have been in constant pain, with a diagnosis of Fibromyalgia. Which is not a very fun thing. I guess I am just venting on here all of the things that I don't want to say to the people I know. I am the strong one in my family. I have to pretend like I am happy all the time because I hate the thought of me causing anyone to worry. Yesterday I kept wondering why? Why do I have to be in pain, why can't I be a mother, I am not after material things I just want this. But my answer came last night when I went to church, through the Word of God. We are not promised that the way was going to be easy, in Revelations John saw those that were robed in white that had came out of great tribulation. We have to serve the Lord and trust in Him in the good times and in the bad. If we suffer with him we will reign with him. No matter what is going on in my life, I know the Lord is right there by my side, he is our refuge, he is a very present help in the time of trouble. Sometimes we have to endure some things but through every valley that we go through there will be a mountaintop and we will be rejoicing with the Lord. I know there will be a time when the Lord will heal my body from this pain, I know that there will be a time when I will look into my childs eyes and get to know that feeling. And if you are out there going through this and you are lost living without the Lord in your life now is the time to call on Him. Ask him, with your whole heart to save your soul and He will lead and guide you and you willbe able to make it through anything. And if you are out there and you are saved and you know what peace that the Lord can send in a time of need then you are truley blessed! My friends I know that it is hard and sometimes it seems you can't go on. But look up to Jesus the author and the finisher of our Faith!